Oh, my… Where to even start… Today I’m launching a series I’ve been thinking about doing for some time now. Actually, I’ve wanted to do it since I started the blog. However, I have done a few “Life Lessons” posts over the years, but I really want to make it a regular thing on OSB. So what does a “Life Lessons” series include? Really, it could be a ANYTHING… But I’m going to be focusing on those things that have really impacted my life: dating, becoming an entrepreneur, stress and anxiety, friendships, hardships, and more.
For this very first post, I want to talk about something that has become extremely eye opening for me over the last few months. It has helped me understand who I am and why I act the way I do more than anything…no joke. Also, it made me realize I’m not just a crazy girl when it comes to dating and a few other areas in my life. It’s called The Enneagram Test.
So let me start off by saying this post might be a little long! I’ll start at the beginning of my Enneagram journey… Back in February I got dumped completely out of the blue, desperately needed a roommate to help pay my mortgage, didn’t have any new client prospects for work, and my faith in God was a gone. I felt numb to everything. That drive I normally have to pick myself up and “get it together” just wasn’t there… I needed a mental break from life.
That’s when I decided it might be a good time to go see a therapist. No matter what my friends and family were saying to try and encourage me it just wasn’t getting through. I needed an outside opinion and help. Luckily, two of my best friends told me about their amazing therapist and couldn’t say enough good things about her. My first session with her was 2 hours!
I don’t remember if she told me about The Enneagram Test in my first session, but she did tell me it was a big part of her training. Of course, it wasn’t required that I take the test to see her, but my two friends really persuaded me to take it. So I took it… Holy shit, I thought someone was inside my head reading all my thoughts. It was scary how accurate this test was about my personality, traits, thoughts, and so much more.
So what the heck is The Enneagram? Basically, it’s a personality test but on a much deeper level of self-discovery. (TIP: Pay the $12 to take the full test!) You are scaled on a number system from 1-9, but all numbers are good. Don’t think any one number is better than the other. We all have issues! Each number falls in a “center” which refers to their main issues. I’m in the “Thinking Center” which means I have major issues with fear. Also, each number has a “wing” which means you carry some characteristics of a number next to you. Lastly, every number has a number they move towards when they are stressed and a different number they move towards during growth.
Okay, so I’m a SIX! My number is called THE LOYALIST. Apparently, we are the easiest numbers to spot. We are the most stressed and anxious number within the Enneagram (#awesome). We are also the most loyal people you will ever meet, and you want a friend like us!
Our basic fear is not having support, and our basic desire is to have security. Yep, nailed it. I’m pretty darn confident, but I’m always looking for someone to back me up or tell me I’m doing the right thing. Let’s go back to February… I was the most insecure I’ve ever been. Literally, I had no idea where things were going with work, thought I was going to have to sell my new house and move back to Oklahoma, and I was convinced I’d never meet another guy or get married. FYI…sixes go to the worst case scenario a lot.
Clearly, that isn’t the case. The blog was doing really good so I decided it was time to give the “full-time blogger” thing a chance and took the leap to start the Blogger Boss Workshop! There are still lots of insecurities with both, but I’m loving it! Obviously, I’m still not married but I have faith God is working on that part of my life. Speaking of FAITH… That is one positive about sixes. We may struggle with worry and anxiety, but when we establish a trustworthy belief (for me faith in God) we hold on to it freaking tight.
I mentioned on Instagram that last week was a very difficult week because my faith was questioned. I let my fear take control instead of believing that God’s plan is greater than mine. This is a common pattern for me when I’m dating. I get so scared the guy isn’t going to like me for me, and then my mind goes “girl crazy”. I’m so confident in all other aspects of my life, but I swear when it comes to a guy I really like all my confidence goes out the window. I’m not letting that happen anymore!!
Actually, one of the biggest things I’ve learned from the Enneagram is everyone doesn’t think the way I think… I seriously had no idea other people didn’t talk to themselves in their head, or play out conversations repeatedly. The Enneagram Six description even says our minds are like a ping pong ball constantly going back and forth! No wonder I’m freaking mentally exhausted so much!!!
Okay, I’ll wrap it up… After taking the test I’ve learned so much about myself. I’ve learned how to deal with my worry and anxiety SO MUCH BETTER. I can recognize where it’s coming from, and not let myself go over the edge. Also, I’ve made everyone in my life take The Enneagram Test, haha! I don’t think they all wanted to take the test, but I pretty much made them. And because of that, I feel like my relationships across the board are stronger.
This test may not change your life like it has mine, but I guarantee you will take something positive away from the experience!!! Please share below if you take the test!