I might be a little late on the New Year’s resolution bandwagon, but I guess it’s okay because I’m not making resolutions this year. Why? Mainly because each year they are always the same… Get in shape. Eat healthier. Work harder. Go to church every week. And the list goes on and on and on… But, what I’ve realized is all of these “resolutions” are really just things I should be doing regardless. If I want to be a better person it’s not going to happen in one month. Agreed?
Also, these “resolutions” always create such high expectations of myself and if I don’t meet them I beat myself up. If there is one thing I learned about myself last year, it was why I am the way I am. I took the Enneagram Test which completely changed things for me. This past fall, I took a 12-week Enneagram class where I learned my biggest strength and weakness are the same… I think too much. I have great ideas and thoughts, but “doing” something about them is a struggle. No wonder my resolutions never play out!
I could go on and on about the Enneagram, but if there is one thing you should do this year to better yourself it’s take the Enneagram test and learn all about it! Then email me and let’s chat 🙂
So… Yes, no resolutions this year. Creating long term goals are much more realistic! After the year I had last year, the biggest GOAL of mine for this year is NO EXPECTATIONS. Last year was the year of professional highs, and personal lows. All the expectations that I had for my personal life were smushed. However, I had zero expectations in my professional life and look what happened… I became a full-time blogger and the biggest high of my year was starting the Blogger Workshop.
I am positive that was God’s way of saying, “Stop trying to work it out for yourself. If you trust me and let me take control then things will work out for the best.”. It’s taken me a few months, but I’ve never felt this calm about my life. It’s like this weight of worrying all the time is gone.
Don’t get me wrong… There are going to be epic highs, and epic lows again this year. I’m sure I’ll need to be pulled back down to reality at some point, and reminded to “Let Go. Let God.”. I think I’m going to have to make a big sign that says “no expectations” to put in my bathroom or somewhere so I have a daily reminder.
MY 2018 GOALS
- No expecations
- Be in His word
- Be brave and trust His timing
I’ve talked about the first one, and I’ve actually started working towards the second one by joining a bible study last fall. Like I said earlier, I’ve made a resolution each year to read the Bible more but that’s never happened. Now I have accountability each week to a group of women to be in the word. If I look back over the last few years, the best points in my life have been when I’m closet to Him.
My last goal is the absolute hardest, and what I struggle with more than anything. As I said earlier, my personal life last year was not so great. A month into 2017, I was heartbroken completely out of the blue. I had no roommate so I was in a not so great financial situation, and it was the first time I think I was angry at God. Like really really really angry.
I was so angry because I thought it was finally my turn to get married. I always thought I wouldn’t get married until I was 30 years old, and it was finally the year. Ummmm nope! I started reading “A Purpose Driven Life”, and that’s when I understood it’s okay to be angry at God. I was praying prayers I didn’t really believe because I knew deep down He does have the best plan for me so I thought if I continued to pray I’d feel better. That didn’t help. I just ended up crying more, and eventually when I really just let it all out that was the only thing that made everything better.
Last night, I went to a “Reflect & Refocus” workshop with Polished. My dear friend and spiritual mentor, Jenn Jett, spoke about her “year of yes” and being brave. At the end, she asked for three women to share what they needed to be brave about this year. That’s when it hit me. I have to be brave about dating again, and potentially getting my heart broken. Guess what… Even though I feel like I’m in a great place right now, sharing that out loud is still terrifying. Literally my biggest fear.
But, 2018 is the year of no expectations. That means I can’t expect to find my husband, but I also can’t expect to get heartbroken. The only thing I can rely on to reach my goals is FAITH.
So what are your goals for 2018? What expectations might be holding you back? Where can you let go, and let God?
It is a tough thing to get your heart broken, but on the bright side, it didn’t happen after marriage and end in divorce. You don’t want to have to question your marriage. Good things fall apart so better things can come together 🙂 Some wise words from Marilyn. Like you said, how can we have expectations if we’re trusting God? We have to do our part, but his plans for us are to prosper – keep in mind that this will all come together for good. Congratulations to you for a great professional year!
I love this, I haven’t related so much to a post in a long time! Wishing you all the best in 2018!
Such a well written, brave and helpful post. God is using you in ways you don’t even know! Proud of you and I know He is too!! Happy 2018 – Love you! Buffy